School is hard. September is a stressful time of year. People have expectations of you again, academia comes back in full force to punish you for being disabled anyway it can — don’t fear. You can do this. There are strategies. They may not make everything perfect, and your mileage for each may vary, but here’s a list of some strategies for coping with school when you’re dealing with disability (especially, such as in the case of the author, some combination of chronic/terminal illness and learning disability). Read on for some tips that are particularly helpful to me and may take the edge off of your study stress as well.

       When you’re working with limited energy, it’s important to plan time for studying in advance and plan the rest of your ‘extra’ activity for the day around it, to make sure you don’t run out of spoons/battery/HP/[insert chronic illness analogy system you use here]. Plan so you’ll have enough energy to study for a couple of hours throughout the day. They don’t have to be all at once— take breaks as often as you need to! Just make sure that you don’t run out of energy for studying during the breaks.

         If you’re sick, you’ll probably miss a lot of class. In fact, even if you’re able to go to class, you might have trouble learning due to pain, fatigue, or other stressful symptoms. If this is a problem for you, a possible way to help keep up in a more comfortable setting than a classroom is to find a tutor if you can afford one. Meeting a tutor in your house or a public place for an hour or two is way less strenuous than going to school all day. If you’re too sick to go to school but well enough for a little bit of lighter activity, private tutoring can help make up the studying you miss in class.

If you can’t afford a tutor or tutoring doesn’t work for you, studying with a friend is another way to help keep up. After all, they’re taking the same classes as you, so they know exactly what to study. (And, if you feel bad about needing to ask them for help a lot, don’t! You’re actually helping them. The best way to learn is to teach!)

And of course, don’t be afraid to look up resources online that help you. Everyone has different learning styles— some prefer videos, some text explanations, some use flash cards or practice tests. Some people learn best by taking notes, and others prefer listening to lectures. There’s lots of free software and resources online for all of these things! Feel free to shop around and experiment until you find what makes it stick. It’ll save you time and energy, not to mention stress.

           Okay, I know every ‘study tumblr blog’ tells you that you should have a fancy desk with a little lamp and a swivel chair and rainbow highlighters, all that crap. But you don’t need to. You really don’t. In fact, you probably shouldn’t!

Depending on the particular quirks of your body, sitting in a desk can be okay, or it can be agonizing. If it’s agonizing, (and I can’t believe I have to say this, but I needed to hear it myself, so I will), DON’T DO IT. Sit on a couch, or a bean bag, or the floor, or your bed! Make sure you have some back support in there! Get a heating pad, all the ice packs, keep your meds and refreshments nearby. Make yourself comfortable! You will study better, and be less likely to succumb to the looming flare or burnout.

       Just don’t do it. You know better. Abled students know better. I know it’s tempting, I know it feels like you should or have to, but I’m serious that it’s much better to be missing homework or to be unprepared for a test than it is to pull an all-nighter and get sicker during the day. You’ll ruin your whole week. Missing the assignments will only ruin the one day. Use your head, be kind to yourself. Get some sleep.

        You need a support system. It’s not a distraction, it’s self-care. People care about you and want to know how you’re doing. Tell them. And then talk a little more. Isolating yourself will make everything seem bleak and horrible. Talk to people, and not just to vent (even though you can do that too). Remember that you’re a person with relationships, not just someone who has to scramble to work all the time.

        Ask for extensions. Ask for make-ups. Go to office hours and extra help sessions. Ask questions. ***If your situation is safe,*** explain your medical needs, as much as you feel comfortable. Demand in-class accommodation when you need it and stand your ground. You work harder than any of the abled students just by showing up — know that. Be proud of that. You did that. Get what you need!

           Your GPA is not more important than your health. I don’t care what your parents, teacher, guidance counselor, step-cousin’s uncle’s ex-wife’s rabbi’s dog groomer, or whoever the heck else says. People fail things all the time and they survive. You will be okay. (Also, while we’re here: intelligence is an ableist social construct; please stop self-deprecating by uncritically calling yourself “stupid.”)

         Attendance policies are discriminatory nonsense; that is a given. But it’s still hard to overcome all the pressure schools place on it. We get awards for good attendance, and we get kicked out for bad attendance. It’s stressful. But if you can, staying home and studying is much better than going to class and getting sicker. Even if you can’t study, it’s okay to just rest when you really need to. If you’re sick, you’re sick. Some things are out of your control. Don’t feel bad about it, just take care and get through it.

      Listen, you’d all know I’d be lying if I said that that list wasn’t aiming high for one day. I don’t always get all of those in. I usually need a lot of help for most of them, mainly because I can’t swallow or cut my own food, but also because of dissociative identity disorder and other associated psychological dysfunctions. Self-care is a b*tch. But it’ll honestly make everything so much better if you prioritize taking care of your immediate physical needs before anything else. If you don’t, emotional well-being will deteriorate, especially if you’re overwhelmed with schoolwork and struggling with systemic barriers concerning your health.

       Cramming and overworking yourself can make it feel like you’re never going to make it out. Sometimes it’s all you can do, but when you’re feeling hopeless and burnt out and just exhausted, the most important thing to remember is that this isn’t your life. You still exist outside of school. When you take that test, when the semester ends, or summer comes, or you finally graduate, you’ll get to relax. It’s all going to be okay. You’ll get through this. Find something to look forward to, and do a little something nice for yourself every day so you can get through until that something comes. It’ll help keep you motivated and as focused as possible for the time being, and your mental health will be spared a lot of toll.