Personally, I think the goal of gaining independence as a disabled person is extremely important. Sadly, some of us may be scared about the idea of independence, or may not know how to improve, or just don’t know where to start. Whatever it may be, this is a shortlist of tips for ways to gain independence as a disabled person.
1. Learn accessible transit routes (bus/trains)
Often disabled people require the use of public transit to travel. Sadly, not every form of transit is accessible, so learning how to use transit when disabled is important. It can be scary; the thought of being trapped alone at a bus stop, having an elevator break on you, or something else. With the proper research, though, it can be done safely, and soon you will be a pro. Before a trip, plan it out online; public train/bus websites will show you accessible platforms and bus stops. But be sure to constantly check as sometimes normally accessible places may not be available for a period of time. It is also a good idea to have anther transit plan in case you get somewhere that says it’s accessible and it’s not. Overall, accessible transit is all about planning and once it’s figured out it’s easy and is a great first step to independence.
2. Learn accessible transits (transit just for disabled people)
Sometimes Public transit doesn’t work; its expensive, crowded and it’s hard to constantly be planning and checking If your routes are accessible. That is why there is public transportation made just for disabled people. The vans/busses are called different things depending on where you live and there are different processes and requirements to be able to access the service. Check with your local accessible transit to see what is needed to apply and what they offer. Prices are cheaper or the same as public transit and they take you further in one car/van than taking multiple public transit systems. They often offer a wide verity of ways to ride; one way, a ride to and from your destination and a routine pick up or drop off. If you had a doctor’s appointment at the same place, same time; once a month you can call ahead of time and tell them that. In result, you will always have a ride to that appointment unless you cancel. Accessible transit, if available in your area is a great resource to have.
3. Get adaptive technology, if you can:
We are lucky to live in the 21st century where adaptive technology is continuing to grow. There are many writing programs, special computers, pens that record, and more to help make your daily job or school life easier. Don’t be nervous to ask your school or work about what adaptive technology is available to support you. While there are many things that you may be able to do, an adaptive tool makes that task easier which encourages you to continue that independent task. Back to transportation, there are also ways to modify cars so you can drive them, hand controls instead of foot controls, sliding chairs, ramps, and more are available to make you independent. To find new technology geared to disabled people go to one of the Abilities Expos or their website. They are offered in Canada and the US. They showcase new technologies to try out right there. It is a great place to go to learn what is available to help you gain independence.
4. Learn to cook and use adaptive cooking equipment:
Often, cooking independently is a difficult task when physically disabled. A kitchen is often a place that really reminds you that you are physically disabled; moving around a tight kitchen, unable to use normal tools to cook and feeling reliant on people for a basic necessity. But, with a little bit of research and understanding what tools will help best, there is adaptive cooking equipment available. There are cutting boards, knives, peelers, and more to assist in you when cooking. Like always, research is important, finding the equipment you need is first then finding somewhere to purchase it is next. Cooking equipment may seem like a small thing but will drastically change your life when it comes to independence. Being able to cook your own meal will make you feel less dependent on people and you will be proud of the meals you have created.
5. Learn about your medication, making appointments, and filling out medical forms:
As a disabled person, our life is revolved around doctors, medication, and appointments. Often we are used to are parents/ legal guardians doing the work regarding the medical world. However, learning to do it yourself is extremely important to become an independent adult. Learning the names of your medication and the dosages is hard but keeping a record in your phone or a notebook makes it easier to recite or you can just hand over your phone to whoever needs the information. Having a script to follow when calling for a doctor’s appointment can make those first few calls easier. Filling out pages of medical forms is also a daunting task, remembering every surgery dates, medical procedures and past medical problems is a lot. Again, write it down on your phone or a notebook. Have a second note for all surgeries. Important procedures, a basic summary of your condition, and more relevant information can be stored so all you need to do is copy it onto these forms. It takes the stress away from having to memorize everything. Managing your own medical care is important and starting early will make the transition to adulthood much easier.
6. Have a conversation about independence with your parents/guardians so they can help give you more independence tasks:
Our parents and guardians love us and sometimes that means doing everything for us thinking they are helping us, when actually they may be hurting us as they assume we can’t complete a task without help. If that is how you feel sit them down and have a talk about your feelings and how you hope that they would ask if you need help instead of assuming and do it for you. They do it out of love but sometimes it can be overbearing. If they do everything for you, you will have no experience being independent when it comes time to head to school, work, or your own home. Having this conversation early and explaining how you would like to be helped only when asked will have your parents/guardians admire you for your push for independence.
7. Offer to do chores such as laundry/cleaning to gain experiences and confidence:
While parents may agree that becoming independent is something you should work towards, asking you to do things may be a challenge for them. They may just forget to ask, or feel they can just do it faster or just assume it is too much of a challenge. Break those ideologies, intentionally or not by asking. Make yourself available and ask to learn how to vacuum, do laundry, wipe down counters. Ask to be taught and prove to your parents/guardians that you are serious about your previous talk, that you want this. Once you learn these tasks continue to volunteer to do them. Ask for multiple tasks, or a rotation of them to learn new skills. There is a wide verity of household tasks to learn to become an independent adult, it is important to get started as soon as you can when you have people around to teach and help you.
8. Try to do things that are hard but not impossible:
Often there are a lot of tasks that disabled people are capable of, but because they need a little more time and effort to accomplish the task, it is given up on. If you recognize yourself feeling scared to do tasks or about to give up on one, ask yourself if you actually can’t do it or if it would just be harder to do but it can be done. For example, if it takes you longer to walk to the fridge and get a drink over asking a family member, remind yourself that you can still do it and do it. You will feel so great working hard to accomplish something. If reaching something is hard, get a reacher and use it, it is a huge help to get things that may be too high or too low. If it takes you longer to write a shopping list, try it out on your own. These little things make a huge difference in your daily independence.
9. Learn to be okay telling people that their help isn’t wanted/needed:
Able-bodied people often help disabled people, even without asking. Some do this with kindness, some do it unknowingly and some due it with the ablest attitude, assuming your incapable. While it’s easy to tell the person their wrongdoing when it is someone doing it to be kind, it is harder to stand up for yourself. Being independent is doing things yourself, and often, it’s hard to do so when people keep jumping in to help when you don’t ask. Learning that it’s okay to say no to help is an important step for independence. Telling someone that is trying to push you up a hill, or someone reaching to get you something you might’ve dropped on accident, that you’d rather not have their help, is important. Learning to say, “No thank you, I can do it” is all that is needed to be said and the person should respect that. Be firm and clear to get the message across.
10. The final but most important step, you need to want independence:
To be independent you need to want it. It’s easy to blame it on your disability, claiming tasks are too hard, and putting yourself down by telling yourself you’re incapable. You may have others telling you the same thing. Remind yourself that having fears about independence is understandable but with little steps, it can grow and be accomplished. The joy you will feel when accomplishing an independent task, and having an easier, independent daily routine will make you feel capable of caring for yourself and being on your own. Little independent tasks amount to a lot and will drastically improve your daily life. Having independence isn’t easy but with dedication, motivation, and a little bit of research, it can be done.
